UNLEASHED (at work & home) with Colleen Pelar

Aging - Lori Stevens

Each of us wants to be happy and healthy. Most people don’t see how closely the two are tied.

Yes, you can be unhappy and healthy. And you can be happy and unhealthy. But did you know that improving one of these states almost always has a beneficial effect on the other? They’re closely interconnected.

Lori Stevens is an expert in helping dogs age well, and I invited her to explore ideas of how pet professionals can age well also.

She says that health, mobility, and engagement are three areas she focuses on for her canine clients. She wants the dogs to feel, to borrow Kathy Sdao’s phrase, the “spark of joy” in their lives.

You deserve a spark of joy too.

You deserve to feel a deep sense of connection with others and the world at large.

You deserve to be excited and enthused by learning more about the topics that interest you and sharing what you’ve learned with others.

You deserve a body that feels good and works well. You deserve to sleep comfortably and deeply and to wake up refreshed. You deserve to eat food that is delicious and nourishing.

You deserve to spend time in beautiful surroundings, exercising and exploring, and also resting and relaxing.

You deserve all that and more.

Are you getting it? If not, what’s getting in your way? What choices—big and small—can you make right now that your future self will thank you for?

Creating small, sustainable habits is a powerful way of making large, lasting improvements in your quality of life.

It’s the best investment you can possibly make for aging well, happily and healthily. Lori shares lots of great ideas in this episode. I have no doubt you’ll be inspired to make a few changes that will support you.

You may also be interested in the list of short (15 minutes or less), medium (about an hour), and long (2 hours or more) activities that the members of UNLEASHED Resilience came up with in a learning lab session. Perhaps these will spark some new ideas for you. https://colleenpelar.com/68

Consultation - Alison Leslie

Advocacy can be challenging, exhausting work.

This week on UNLEASHED (at work & home), Allison Leslie, LCSW, talked with me about "consultation" and its many benefits:

• Less burnout
• More engagement
• Greater creativity
• Less sense of isolation
• Increased joy and ability to see meaning in your work
• More FUN

That’s a win by any measure!

Consultation can be one-on-one (like in coaching calls) or done as part of a small group. The key is that it be a safe place to share your truth, knowing that the participants have your back and want what’s best for you.

You’ll be amazed at how having this support will allow you to ease the burden of your work and find ways to develop stronger and more effective skills so you can continue making a difference without burning yourself out.

Breath - Your Hidden Superpower

Would you like an easy way to get more energy when you need it? How about a way to relax and unwind more quickly?

Listen in to learn an incredibly simple strategy that will help you manage your energy and your emotions better.

 

Vicarious Trauma - Leslie Stewart

Burnout is normal—and fixable

• Have you had the “Sunday night feeling,” the stomach-sinking realization that your break is over and it’s time to go back to work?
• Have you become less patient and less interested in other people’s needs?
• Do other people’s choices leave you feeling irritable or cynical?
• Have you started making dumb mistakes? Letting things fall through the cracks that ordinarily you’d catch
• Have you felt isolated? Had the sense that everyone’s counting on you, but no one really cares about how you’re holding up?
• Does it feel like whatever you do is never enough?
• Do you find yourself unable to leave work at work?
• Are you replaying situations in your head long after they’re over? Do people tell you you need to “let it go?” 

If you answered yes to some of these questions, it’s likely you’ve experienced a period of professional burnout.

Leslie Stewart, PhD, LPC, says this is completely normal and to be expected.

Really. It’s normal. And expected.

In fact, most helping professionals (counselors, doctors, nurses, firefighters, social workers, and, yes, pet professionals) will have a few bouts of professional burnout in their careers.

Well, that’s good news and bad news.

The good news is that there are lots of helpful strategies you can use to set yourself up for success. You may not be able to completely avoid periods of struggle, but knowing what to look for and when to intervene will put you way ahead of the curve.

Visit https://colleenpelar.com/62 for the show notes and to download the Professional Quality of Life Scale, Self-Care Assessment, and recommended wellness activities.

Want to feel like you have more time? Volunteer!

When you are exhausted or burned out, it may come as a surprise to learn that volunteering your time and energy can be one of the very best ways to get your mojo back. It's counter-intuitive, but true.

Studies have shown that volunteering increases your empathy, builds social bonds, and leads to greater happiness. In fact, people who volunteer feel like they have more time than people who don't (even when they have the same demands on their time).

https://colleenpelar.com

Organization - Jamie Holms, RVT

Jamie Holms, RVT, says her extraordinary organizational skills are a coping strategy that developed during a traumatic childhood. Quite simply, she learned to control as many factors as she could to help her deal with all of the chaos and stress she faced daily.

Today those organizational skills make her a valued team member and help her accomplish her goals. 

Coping strategies are interesting. We all have them. We all need them. Some are healthy and productive, others are not, but all of them spring from a place of self-protection.

The tricky part about coping strategies is that they often have their roots in childhood. You may not be aware of what you do to help yourself manage stress or deal with overwhelm because you’ve been doing it for so long that the behaviors are on autopilot. You may not even notice when you’re using them.

Jamie had to make deliberate choices and learn new strategies to ensure that she brings forth the best of her coping skills and leaves behind the elements that no longer serve her.

Developing the self-awareness to observe your behavior and make deliberate choices about it is quite simply the most powerful, life-changing skill ever. It allows you to explore new ways of being, to find what feels right and true for you, and to make deliberate choices about how you want to live your life.

Easier said than done, right? Absolutely. There’s a learning curve here, but it’s worth it. So worth it.

And this awesome discussion with Jamie Holms is filled with practical tips to get you started.

 

Resources mentioned in this episode:

• 168 Hours, You Have More Time than You Think, by Laura Vanderkam: https://amzn.to/35c8ZDJ 
• I Know How She Does It, by Laura Vanderkam: https://amzn.to/2FdzLBm
• Dr. Andy Roark: https://drandyroark.com/
• Uncharted Vet conference: https://unchartedvet.com/
• RecoverInitiative.org: https://recoverinitiative.org/

Note: I may earn a small commission on any books or products recommended on this page. I only include products my guest or I have used and recommend. UNLEASHED (at work & home) is a participant in the Amazon Services LLC Associates Program, an affiliate advertising program designed to provide a means for sites to earn advertising fees by advertising and linking to Amazon.com.

Using rules as a tool for exploration

Exploration is something that most of us think is a good idea in theory, but we don’t do it.

The estimates vary, but neuroscientists and psychologists agree that large chunks of human behavior are merely habits and patterns. The low estimates are 40%. Some estimates go as high as 80-90% of behavior is just on autopilot.

That’s good because it makes us efficient, but it doesn’t necessarily make us happy.

That’s where rules come in. You can create your own rules to spark creativity and exploration, to create new opportunities, and to discover new things about yourself. 

Exploration - Sheila Newenham

Sheila Newenham, DVM, talked with Colleen Pelar about exploration. The whole world is waiting for you. Where do you want to go? What do you want to see? What can you learn from being open to new experiences? www.colleenpelar.com/55

Working through Worries to Make a Decision

The Worst-Case/Best-Case/Mostly Likely Framework is a way of facing and addressing worries.

Your brain is wired to notice everything that could potentially go wrong. Often this can lead to crippling indecision, high anxiety, and catastrophic thinking. It leaves you feeling stuck.

This tool helps you

• Recognize the extreme unlikelihood of your worst-case scenario fears by providing an equally extreme counterpoint in the opposite direction.
• Become more aware of the negativity bias so that you are better able to make real-time adjustments in your thinking
• Use humor and positivity to create a broader, more creative thinking
• More accurately assess the outcomes of possible your choices so you can make decisions based on logic, not anxiety

A big thank you to Alicia Obando of Pitter Patter Parenting in Chicago for helping me demonstrate this tool. 

Reinvention - Karen Sinovich

Is there something you’ve been longing to do? What would give you the courage to dive in? Karen Sinovich, an animal behavior practitioner, shared thoughts about reinvention. You have only one life, but that doesn’t mean you need to have only one passion. www.colleenpelar.com/56